- Are best-friend partners better partners?
- Why you should date your best friend
- 28 Dating Memes That Are Absolutely True
- 5 lies women tell themselves when they're dating married men
We hold our relationships to higher standards than we have in previous decades. In particular, couples now expect their relationships to promote personal growth and help individuals fulfill their own goals.
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For example, your partner should help you become a better person by teaching you new things like how to make the perfect creme brulee, taking you places like the cool new trampoline park and opening your eyes to new perspectives such as the benefits of eating a more vegetarian-based diet. Although this expectation for growth could conceivably place an unwieldy burden on your relationship, researchers believe that modern relationships are up to the task. In fact, the idea that a relationship can help an individual become a better person, a phenomenon that researchers call self-expansion , is a useful one; relationships that provide more expansion are also of higher quality.
In order to hit all these self-improvement targets, you may need more from a spouse or romantic partner than was expected in years past — and a partner who is also your best friend may be a step in the right direction. Think of it this way: We wanted to see if these best-friend romances were really better. This finding is consistent with research showing that relationships with more companionate love — based on friendship, feelings of affection, comfort and shared interests — last longer and are more satisfying.
Are best-friend partners better partners?
Other research shows that those in friendship-based love relationships feel they have a highly likable partner, and that shared companionship is an important part of the love. A study of married individuals revealed that those with higher scores on the friendship-based love scale also reported more relationship satisfaction, greater perceived importance of the relationship, greater respect for their spouse, and felt closer to their spouse.
More recently, across two studies with nearly participants in relationships, those who place more value on the friendship aspect of their relationship also report more commitment, more love and greater sexual gratification. In addition, valuing friendship also decreased the chances of the couple breaking up. Best-friend love is starting to sound better and better. All of these benefits are backed up by accounts from a special type of relationship expert: When researchers asked over of these couples about their secret to relationship success and longevity, what was the number one reason?
The second most common response was liking their spouse as a person, another key facet of friendship-based love. These findings demonstrating the benefits of dating or marrying your best friend make perfect sense when you consider the type of relationship best friends share. Friends enjoy spending time together, share similar interests, take care of each other, trust each other and feel a lasting bond between them. I was always the girl the boys brought out because I just could hang. Don't date the girl who can't hang. She doesn't need to know sports.
She doesn't need to drink beer or be a bro, but you know that scene in "My Best Friend's Wedding" where Cameron Diaz's character is uncomfortable at the karaoke bar, and then all of a sudden she sings a song so badly but everyone cheers and she gets so into it and has the most fun ever? Date a girl like that.
Why you should date your best friend
Date a girl who doesn't get mad if you want to go have a couple beers with the guys, date a girl who has herself together enough to not feel slighted if it's boys night out, and date a girl who is cool enough that hey, you COULD bring her to dude's night out! That your friends like, that your friends can talk to, respect and laugh with.
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The girl who sits with her arms and legs crossed because all the attention isn't on her and her mini dress and how cute she looks when she's taking duck face selfies? Run far far away! My best friend Christine is getting married this September. She and I have known each other since we were But she is marrying HER best friend as well not me, tragically ha.
A guy she went to Lehigh University with, who started out simply as her buddy. They were honest to God friends.
28 Dating Memes That Are Absolutely True
And when graduation rolled around, and New York City and finance came calling, I will never forget sitting down with her in Union Square when she said "I have to tell you something. Several years later, I don't think I remember Christine without Dave anymore. They are the couple who you know didn't just meet at a bar or go on a Match. They know each other. Everything about each other.
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But they're still just the buds you hang out with as a group because they don't pull the lame couple shit that makes you never want to hang with couples. And they've cared for one another long before there was nakedness and intimacy. And to me, that's the girl you should date. The one who was there before the drunk sex or the "she's so hot" or the awkward "should I text her? Friendship has to come first. You have to know that the girl you are gonna be with, maybe even marry, was there before she really had a reason to BE there relationship wise.
The girl who cared because she simply cared about YOU, not you and her together or how it looked to other people. You don't have to date every platonic girl friend you have. But don't count them out. Realize that sometimes the person who knows you the best through friendship might be the chick who will see the best in you when you need it in a relationship. People stick around for a reason. And it can be a lot freakin' easier having awkward first time sex with someone who has probably already held your forehead when you puked from too many Coco Locos in the Dominican on spring break junior year.
Don't discount your friends as being the girl who deserves the love. You'd be surprised to know that the best relationships are usually the ones that are built on some kid of firm foundation of messed up "know you better than anyone" friendship. A version of this article originally appeared on BroBible. Tap here to turn on desktop notifications to get the news sent straight to you. So what do we have here?
Nice people finish last.
5 lies women tell themselves when they're dating married men
And the relationships go one of two ways. Either they end in heartbreak, because the younger woman wants babies and the man can't bear the thought of starting over, or they stay together, and the man eventually becomes a father again in midlife. So why do so many older men hook up with younger woman? Well, the obvious answer is 'because they can'. But what makes young women so attractive to older men? I mean, sure, their bodies are firmer, but why is this so fantastically important? Older men don't have a great deal in common with younger women, and it's an easy option in the long term.
It can be enormously costly to start a new family in midlife, both emotionally and financially. Well, perhaps the answer is fear. For a man, an older partner is a constant reminder of his own age. He cannot pretend he's still thirty when he's waking up next to a fifty-year-old woman.
A younger partner is life-affirming. She helps to stave off his own fear of aging and mortality.