What is a good initial message for online dating

First Message Strategy #1: Go For Laughs
Contents:
  1. Good First Message Online Dating
  2. How to Write Your First Online Dating Message
  3. There’s more to it than you think
  4. Good First Messages for Online Dating

Good First Message Online Dating

Online dating gives you a bit of an advantage in that you can strategically plan that first message so it hits home with a bit of a punch. Unlike an everyday face to face meeting where the words just tumble from your mouth in no apparent order. So why is it that so many guys and girls yes girls too fail miserably in avoiding the move from the Inbox to the trash can?


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Extensive research into online dating statistics show that there are some set rules that we all need to follow. Netspeak is the main culprit when it comes to unsuccessful first mails. The words if you can call them that ur, r, u, ya, cant, hit, realy, luv, and wat, are the top nine worst words to use in an opening message. Mails that contain these words will get practically no replies proving that intelligence or maybe just good grammar is an attractive trait in both sexes.

Surprisingly, though, ha ha and lol were considered ok to use.

How to Write Your First Online Dating Message

Perhaps this is because using both these terms shows a sense of humour, another trait many seek in a partner. But hehe , while still effective tends to sound a bit like a supervillain. Now it might seem strange to say that after we just told you to use correct grammar, but messages that start off with Hello or Hi come across as run of the mill and perhaps a bit boring.

1. Make sure your profile is complete before you message anyone

So while you should avoid using netspeak too much, using slang or an unusual greeting is considered a great move. You could always spruce it up a bit and go with a foreign greeting, but make sure you know what it means otherwise you could come off looking like a bit of a Del boy.

ONLINE DATING FIRST MESSAGE TIPS + 3 Openers That Work

While everybody enjoys compliments on their looks, focusing too much on physical looks seems to imply shallowness. Messages using words like beautiful and sexy will more often than not end up getting deleted immediately. Better to focus on interests, or even better, common interests. Talking about your own interests can give the recipient a good idea of what you are like.

Nothing starts a conversation quicker than a question, so do yourself a huge favour and simply ask one. If their profile made you laugh out loud in the middle of Tesco, say it.


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  • If you despaired of ever meeting a woman who loved football even if you question her choice of team , say it. The easiest way to start a conversation with anyone new is to ask a question, so include one.

    There’s more to it than you think

    Tailor it to their interests or their work, or even one of their photos. A good first message is sweet, and short. One hundred words is about right: Just aim to get a conversation going. As they say in showbiz, leave them wanting more.

    Good First Messages for Online Dating

    Similarly, if you claim to love your job but the time stamp on your message says you sent it at 9. Stick to neutral hours, like lunchtimes and early evening. Ideally, write it before you leave the house to do something interesting. Have fun writing your messages, and enjoy the process of meeting someone new. For more helpful tips head over to our advice pages or blog! This is the perfect time of year to get serious about your quest for love.