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This is true for attraction and women just as much as anything else. Your success with women is in proportion to the perceived value that you offer. Some guys do the complete opposite. And in the end, this destroys their own self-esteem and self-worth.
This is what makes your self-worth and confidence grow sky high. Everything you do and say will ooze self-belief. What is the gift you can give? It could be as simple as brightening her day by making her smile or giving her a unique compliment. Teaching her something or learning a new skill together. Helping her tick off something on her bucket list. Perhaps even something as important as supporting her to achieve her life goals. Whatever suits your awesomeness, whatever fits in with your desires to help, whatever you think she will value — do it to the best of your ability.
Take pride in it, like a skilled craftsman takes pride in every piece of work he does. Your awesomeness is in you, ready and waiting to make an impact. The only thing you need to do is make the choice to share it every single chance you get. It does not mean relinquishing your own value and self-worth and handing it over.
It does not mean muting your inner voice. When you are adding value the right way, it adds value to your life as well as theirs. It makes you feel great, as well as them. If not, or if you can do more, I challenge you to start continuously sharing your gift of awesomeness at every opportunity. That means every Tinder conversation and every date.
This confidence and self-worth will also flow into other areas of your life. This is a highly unusual approach. Not many men play at this level so women will notice you immediately. All it takes is a choice. Add value by sharing your awesomeness, and do it without expecting anything in return. There is no doubt about it, a well-gifted compliment is a tool that can bring you massive success in dating. It is to help her feel trust. Your job is not just to use words and topics to have great conversation. Tansel Ali is a world leading memory expert.
When I was learning how to be memorable and connect with people I had the pleasure of being coached by Tansel. We went deep and explored the art of personal connection.
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One of the overarching principles, as explained by Tansel, was this: Not just the brain. From a logical perspective it might make perfect sense for women to like you and to want to date you. You also need to make sense to women from an emotional perspective. The only way that can be done is by striking the heart and making women feel the right kind of emotions.
One is head-level thinking , the other is gut-level feeling. One is going through the motions, the other is acting on pure desire. One of my clients is an aerospace engineer — a highly analytical kind of guy — who was struggling to get his head around dating. So I coached him to become more aware of the emotions he was making women feel and and how to evoke the right feelings.
What to Say on Tinder: Sex Hookup in 4 Messages
From that point on it all changed for him. A couple of the best emotions you can use on Tinder are suspense and anticipation. They both arise when you inject a little mystery into your conversation. It could be anything like:.
The desire to get closure over unfinished business is more than enough to tilt the table in your favor and improve your Tinder results dramatically. So on Tinder we feel like asking pleasant and comfortable questions like:.
Think of conversation like an onion. On the inside are the deeper and self-revealing topics:. Getting stuck in that first or second layer is why a woman will say: The world-renowned behavioral scientist I mentioned before, Dan Ariely, did an experiment with MIT students on this exact issue. You need to be able to move from small talk to something deeper, more exploratory, and more challenging.
The impact this can have on your success is instant. It comes from a guy who came to me because he was struggling to talk to women. After teaching him about deeper conversation and how to use it on a first date this is what happened:. If having deep and interesting conversation is the way to go, then what do you actually talk about?
What questions should you ask her? A secret weapon of sorts. The amazing thing is that it worked. Six months after the experiment two of the participants ended up getting married. Many years later a lady named Mandy Len Catron famously followed this list of 36 first date questions. She ended up falling in love with the man she went on a date with. Read this list and get a feel for how the questions start off on the outside of the onion and go deeper. These are the type of questions and discussions that create connection.
The questions are broken into three different sets. Each set starts off a little shallow, then builds depth. They promote future visions, openness and honesty, seek out common ground, encourage unity, sharing, emotion, and depth.
5 Steps To Get Laid Using Tinder
Watch the short video below where two people on a blind date undertake a similar process of engaging in meaningful conversation. So back to that list of 36 questions — what are you supposed to do with it?
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Well, even though it sounds silly, you could, and it would help your closeness enormously. When you go deep on a first date you can create consistently powerful connections like you saw in the video. It goes to show that avoiding the friend-zone can be done simply and gentlemanly by asking the right questions. In the first section of this guide you learned the 7 ingredients to connecting deeply with women.
This new skill is going to completely change the way women feel and act toward you. A number of years ago I met this cute college girl named Olivia through an online dating site. Although we had never met up in person, we had been getting to know each other over email for three months. She knew this because for the last three months we had mostly been talking about our jobs. After months of asking about my life I neglected to ask him about his, then, when I realized this I asked him about his job as an engineer! When I knew he was a business analyst!
I want to ask him if we could meet up sometime but I think I blew my chance. She said we should:. Click below to download the free Date-Talk Cheat Pack that includes some amazing openers for you to use: Click to Download Now. I call it the common strategy. The suggestion for the date should flow smoothly from conversation, with an air of acceptance that the first date is a given between the two of you and incorporating a hint of humor.
The week before that, I met five girls from tinder and hooked up with one. Nothing terrifies me more than being so close to someone and then watching them become a stranger again.
Tinder Hookup Strategy - How to hook up with a girl on the first night
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