Racial preference in dating

Ghosting, Caspering and six new dating terms you've never heard of
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  1. Accessibility links
  2. Sexual racial preference - Wikipedia
  3. “I have a thing for mixed-race girls…”
  4. It’s time to ditch the stereotypes and look at the realities behind singledom | Sonia Sodha
  5. 'Least Desirable'? How Racial Discrimination Plays Out In Online Dating

And it's this collective behaviour that sees repeated outcomes for certain groups that constitutes as racist behaviour. On an individual level, it may seem innocent enough. But the fact that figures suggest that certain groups are missing out because of their race means we have to look at the situation more closely. When we don't acknowledge racism in our communities, we can't be too surprised to see its manifestations in our dating lives, too.


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There is good news, though — many of the experts I spoke to for Date My Race talked about how we have been socialised to be attracted to certain groups, whether it's within our own race or outside of it. And because it's something we learn to do, we can also unlearn whatever ideas we may have about certain groups of people. Greater representation in the media could also help reduce the bad experiences people of colour have on online dating sites. Being exposed to different experiences of people from different backgrounds through film, TV and other forms of media challenges our own biases and stereotypes we may have.

Sure, stereotypes exist for a reason, and there may be some truth to them. But they're just that: Reducing large groups of people and dismissing their individuality limits what should be an enjoyable dating experience. It's hard enough being judged online, but to be dismissed because of your race seems rather harsh. In Australia, for example, even if I wanted to date within my own race, the probability of meeting someone in the same age group with shared values is not that great because of the small population of black Africans.

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But importantly, limiting myself to my own race also means that I get to miss out on the wonderful experience of meeting someone who has had a different lived experience to me, and being able to look at the world differently. The more we interrogate our choices a bit more online, then, just maybe, love won't be too far off.

ABC Life helps you navigate life's challenges and choices so you can stay on top of the things that matter to you. This particular exchange, though, was slightly different to the usual ones. Space to play or pause, M to mute, left and right arrows to seek, up and down arrows for volume. Posted Thu Thursday 29 Nov November at Related stories 'Hot for an Asian': Not really, because there is a lot of variability within and across racial groups. So you can find a lot of different traits across ethnic groups.

Sexual racial preference - Wikipedia

I think that things show that people learn to think about sexuality and what attracts them in particular ways that are very much exclusionary to people of colour. This preference for whiteness in dating, do you think sometimes we find that hard to accept? In other countries, like the United States, people have more open conversations. Like screaming at somebody an insult, or not giving somebody a job. In Australia and in other settler nations that have been settled by Europeans, the ideal has always been White.


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But I guess nowadays people understand that racism is not a good thing, nothing to be proud of. What do you say to that?

“I have a thing for mixed-race girls…”

So it becomes a little bit more complicated. I was just thinking before about how you were saying, I think you were mainly talking about in Australia, how whiteness is seen as the main preferred beauty standard. Or what we think of as beauty in certain characteristics in White people. I kind of thought to myself that would be expected, considering that the majority of our population is White.

And an African person would be for Africa. So I just thought that where the majority of the population lies is where the higher majority of the beauty standard is drawn to.

It’s time to ditch the stereotypes and look at the realities behind singledom | Sonia Sodha

What do you think about that? And while many of those migrants have come from various European backgrounds, we do have a lot of diversity.

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And of course Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people have always been here. Australia is a multicultural country. We really need to start embracing that in many different ways, including in the way we think about beauty and attraction. You can just, like you said, you can choose not to match with that person or choose not to pursue that further.

What about people who are White who have a preference for Black people? I went to school with a girl who only dated Black guys. Would that also be considered racist?

'Least Desirable'? How Racial Discrimination Plays Out In Online Dating

Yeah it works both ways — but having a preference for a particular racial minority is still a form of racism. And what we know from research is that when minorities experience this form of attention, it actually affects them quite negatively on a psychological and emotional sense. Stereotypes are one of the ways we try to organise complex information in our social world.

How Black Guys React To Seeing “No Blacks” On Dating Apps

But they are pretty limited. We would all like to be treated as individuals in any social circumstance, but sex and dating in particular. As you say, people really need to be honestly reflecting on the stereotypes that they maintain about racial groups, and asking: Does that really seem fair?


  1. How Racial Discrimination Plays Out in Online Dating : NPR;
  2. How modern dating encourages racial prejudice - BBC Three.
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