- I'm in a real big pickle. Found out I'm dating two best friends
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- The ground rules when your two good friends start dating - HelloGiggles
This is not a secret to either of them. This isn't being hidden from them: I find myself initially interested in both of them -- both are intelligent and striking women -- but I'm really clueless as to how to handle this situation in the best fashion. This assumes, of course, that I don't call the numbers in question and hear "Joey's Pizza" and "Frank's Pizza", respectively. As I think this over, the situation seems to be particularly unusual in that presumably Girl A and Girl B, as friends, are in communication with each other. Furthermore, I should note that I've not had a great deal of experience at all in the romantic arena, and thus, this feels to me like someone with basic algebra skills suddenly finding themselves presented with a calculus question.
Were you to have suggested this particular situation to me 24 hours ago, I would have commended you on the quality of your hallucinogenic. Finally, if all of the above leaves you shrugging in confusion too, your advice would still be appreciated in terms of any general advice you may wish to impart about dating truths you've experienced in your life.
I'm in a real big pickle. Found out I'm dating two best friends
This sounds like something out of a Japanese video game, you know that? There's an entire genre for this kind of thing!
- Degrees of Separation: Where To Draw The Line In Dating People Who Know Each Other?!
- Degrees of Separation: Where To Draw The Line In Dating People Who Know Each Other? | MadameNoire.
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- That time I ended up dating two best friends — in the same night.
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Den Beste at 9: For me personally, things wouldn't get weird between me and one of my girlfriends until things got physical between her and the guy or me and the guy. I agree - lunch is a good tactic here. You can't date both of them for long, but you do need something more than a speed date to choose between them.
As long as you remain open and honest about the fact that you've invited both of them to lunch different lunches, natch , there shouldn't be anything to fear in terms of them being pissed off at you for playing them. Make a choice relatively quickly, though, because the longer you're seeing both of them, the more emotionally invested they both become, and that could be hard on their friendship. Have them both meet you together, with a few friends, at a casual bar. After that, it is unlikely you will still be into both, and they into you. Hope sparks fly with one.
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Do you have a wing man? The four of you could go out someplace, party, bar, whatever, and see where the chips fall, and with four nobody is the odd one out. Plus seeing how the girls treat each other and your friend might tell you more about their personalities than a regular date.
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But expect a little snark on this question; the trolls might not like that your cup runneth over. If one or both of them creates drama over this, this early, I wouldn't be interested in the one, or both, depending. This is a pretty basic early-stage dating situation. If it were me, I'd call them both, make separate dates for both, not really worry about the context of the dates lunch vs whatever , and just play it by ear. Jealousy on either of their parts would be unbelievably lame. The fact that the two of them are friends, in other words, wouldn't represent much more than a "heh, that's amusing" to me.
And not only that. She just called me and said she talked to the roommate and the roommate's into the menage too. That was going around in my head, also. Call who you want to call. Lest there be any uncertainty, mention you're in contact with the other girl. As long as everybody knows where this stands, life is smooth. You're going on a date, not proposing marriage. You sound very uptight. Get a little tipsy and see them both on the same night, telling the first you have to keep it short so as to meet up with 2, then tell her you're sorry you're late, but you were having fun with 1.
Keep it casual and they will both like you. It may sound counterintuitive but that's how the "romantic arena" works. Also, never be afraid of what you really want to do. They should have been aware that such a situation could arise, so they probably would be fine with each going out with you casually one or two more times before you decide which, if either, you prefer.
Just make the decision sooner rather than later. If they have hesitations about the situation, and are reasonably good friends and communicators, they probably will have made an agreement that they should both steer clear of you so they don't get jealous. If either or both of them accepts another date, they're probably cool with it. Though my style is see one on a Thurs around here like a l'il weekend then one on a Friday. Just call them on the same day so neither feels dissed. Don't forget--one night stands often happen back to back. Anyone have a theory as to why?
I'm sure they both will have no problem with it, provided you don't sleep with one on the first date. Just be honest about everything, and when you are sure you like one over the other or neither, let's be honest about all the possibilities here , make the break. They surely must have anticipated the possibility of both being interested in the same person s - in theory they probably offered their numbers to multiple people at the same speed dating event, and if they didn't want to compete they would have gone to different events.
Run, run like the wind.
The ground rules when your two good friends start dating - HelloGiggles
Just because they say they're fine with each other being in the picture, it doesn't mean to say that they will be when one gets picked above the other. It's a horrible drama waiting to happen. If he could pull that off with panache, why would he have asked this question? But yes, call them both the same day to head off any girl-competitiveness. For the love of god, do not wait until you've gone out with one before calling the other.
As long as you don't actively try to play them off of each other, lie about seeing the other, or act like an asshole because yes, the other will hear about it you've got some time to see them seperately before weirdness sets in. After all, they did go to speed dating together and sit next to each other.
If sparks don't fly with either, then perhaps you have two new female friends. On the other hand, if either of them start acting very, very weird, then run Go out with both of them, at once, as friends. Like, go out with both of them to a restaurant, or coffee, or whatever. Treat it like you would any other casual outing with friends. Over time, you'll see if you want to pursue more of a relationship with either of them, but you can still be friendly with both. Or maybe that's bad advice. Still thought I should throw it in the mix. Both of them expressed desires of not wanting to see anyone else and hinting for me to do the same.
I added one on Facebook and noticed in his pics, the other guy was in his pics and his best friend. I like both of them, maybe one a bit more then the other. How do I go about this: Not sure if I even want a relationship right now! So keeping things casual, maybe you should keep things causal until you decide? Maybe opt out of the bbq.
Picture this a different way; you are dating a man, then you discover that your best friend is also dating him. What would you do? Not worry you here but. I doubt it…are you sure they might not been making fun? Guys talk about that…I remember even when I was on tinder myself and the friend of my current bf told him… I find it weird they are suddenly both pursuing you, one even added you on FB and none of them tells the other about a girl they like and want to date….
You never know, they could just be in a same group of friends and not super close, and they could discuss with eachother and decide if one wants to back away, etc. If they were best friends I have a feeling they would have talked about girls they were seeing and figured it out. I have a funny story regarding a very awkward situation that happened to me. I went on a date with a guy two summers ago who I met briefly at a party. He was a really arrogant guy and when he walked me home asked to come upstairs. I never wanted to see him again because he seemed like the type of guy who thinks girls just do whatever he wants and was just looking for sex.
The following March, I match on Tinder with a guy who pursued me pretty aggressively. He invited me to go to a baseball game with him and his friend who was also bringing a date. This guy added me on Faceook BEFORE the date, and I did a bit of snooping before the date and noticed he and the jerky guy had photos together, but I had already committed to the date and figured — what are the odds? OMG imagine the look on my face when we all meet up to go to the game together and it IS the jerky guy. I just knew when I had to go to the bathroom that they would talk to eachother.