- I dated my university professor – and it was a messy, eye-opening experience
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- Dating your professor
- Dating your Professor - media-aid.com Blog
Start on equal footing. When you enter into a relationship with someone who you would normally see as an authority figure, the dynamic can easily carry over into your private life.
I dated my university professor – and it was a messy, eye-opening experience
This person is going to be your partner, not your superior. Be assertive early on to avoid finding yourself in a disparate situation.
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If you find that an older professor is actively pursuing you, stop to consider why they would do such a thing. You want to believe that you are smart, funny, and attractive, but the main thing you have to offer a person who is significantly older than you and probably smarter and more experienced is status.
By dating a student, a professor may gain self-esteem and garner the envy of his colleagues or friends. Davis explained when he was dean over the Biology department that he had to let a teacher go due to this issue.
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He mentioned it was the student who came forward, and it was the Vice President of Academic Affairs that notified him about the situation. According to the policy for professors and adjuncts at UVU, teachers are instructed to not have any type of relationship with a current student.
Another professor who has been at UVU for over ten years mentioned that he was not sure if there was anything in his contract about whether or not he could have a consensual relationship with a current student. The professor further explained that the university has made statements about sexual harassment, but nothing else. When a teacher is hired to work for the school, they have to go through sexual harassment training online and must retake this training every three years.
In the policy for teachers and adjuncts, the school briefly discusses how to appropriately interact with students. However, the university has not felt the need to take further steps to educate teachers on how to appropriately interact with students. A few seconds of eye contact every couple of minutes can go a long way, even subconsciously.
Make sure you are smiling when you make eye contact. Putting a friendly look on your face will make you look confident and more attractive. Dress nicely for class. Avoid revealing clothing, as that is inappropriate for the classroom. Instead, wear clean, form-fitting clothing that accentuates the positive parts of your physique. You will impress your professor by looking professional, or at least not ruin his or her opinion of you by dressing inappropriately.
For style, accentuate your curves, especially those parts of your body that you want your professor to look at. Nice shoes, instead of a ragged pair of old sneakers, can help as well. In terms of color, red is always good for drawing attention, and projecting an image of strength and confidence.
Professors love it when students ask and answer questions. It lets them know they are reaching students, and that the class is engaged in what is going on.
Dating your professor
The important thing is that your professor sees you as paying attention and willing to learn. Avoid joke answers, as professors usually find that to be an annoying distraction.
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Lean forward when you talk in class. Leaning forward when you talk reinforces that you want to get closer to her, even if that effect will probably only be subconscious. Running a class can be difficult, especially when it is probably one of several your professor has, and he will appreciate any help he can get. Volunteer to present something, or jump into discussions during silence. This will help give your professor a positive opinion of you.
This can work in an in-class debate, or if another student is trying to argue about the requirements for an assignment.
Dating your Professor - media-aid.com Blog
Keep your input brief, as it is more important that your professor notices you jumped in to help rather than what you actually said. This is also the kind of thing you can do after class, telling your professor that you appreciated the position he took. He may not need your help, but will appreciate your offering. Do well in the class. Your professor is more likely to notice a student who is doing well and making an effort to be successful in class.
Professors notice and like students who follow directions and show improvement over the course of the semester. Tell the professor he is doing a good job. Professors work hard on their classes, and like the satisfaction of knowing that it went well. Plus, this little bit of conversation becomes another way for him to remember who you are.
Be sure to smile and make eye contact when you tell him this. This gives you a friendly demeanor, and subtly suggests you are trying to make a connection. Pay attention for clues about her personal life. It is hard for class to focus on the subject material the whole time, and your professor will surely slip in comments about her life and interests. Learning this information is not necessarily for your use in class, but so you have some topics in mind to talk about later.
You want to find potential signs of common interest. Like any other relationship, your compatibility will be tied to having some things in common. Look for a wedding ring on the fourth finger of the left hand, and listen if she mentions some kind of significant other. Talk to him outside of class. As the semester goes along, he will almost certainly become more comfortable talking to you.
Things happening around campus, in the news, or really anything can be a good way to start conversation. Your conversations will need to move beyond academic topics if you want an actual relationship. Use these chats as a chance to learn more about him.
Listen if he starts to share his interests with you, like food or music.